MotherlyBlessingsInMyLife: Maternal Narcissism and Fathers

Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Maternal Narcissism and Fathers

I was raised in a family with a narcissistic mother. This article caught my attention because I always felt like my father was not there for me. I am sure there was way more going on behind the scenes that what I knew about or was aware about. What I do know is that to the outside world we represented the All American Family. Behind closed doors, we were anything but the All American Family. As I continue to learn more about how narcissism affects children, I know I am learning how to stop this legacy.

I am sharing the link below from Psychology Today. It is well worth the read.

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-legacy-distorted-love/201311/where-was-daddy

I am so grateful to Dr. McBride, her research on the topic of maternal narcissism and her book
"Will I Ever Be Good Enough." All children deserve to know that they are heard and valued for who they are.

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My First Blessing

"Stinker Poo" is my oldest daughter who was my only blessing for 14 years. She had to endure being raised by a single parent and put up with all of my crazy yearnings for another baby. She is very quick witted and has never ceased to amaze me with her humor. She has a love of reading which definitely did not come from me. She has always taken her education seriously and worked hard at learning. She graduated high school as Valedictorian, got her BS from Texas A&M and her Master's from Univeristy of Texas at Dallas. She is currently teaching full-time and is working on her PhD. She is married and has followed her love of learning and teaches. From the day she was born she inspired me and she continues to be my inspiration each day.

My Second Blessing

"Bubba Doo" is my oldest son and the blessing I was afraid I would never have. After a miscarriage, failed third marriage, 13 unsuccessful inseminations and a failed legal risk foster placement I was thrilled to be able to foster Bubba Doo for his first 30 days of life. What started out to be a 30 day foster care stay turned into a six month stay. I was able to adopt him when he was 8 months old. He is the miracle that I thought I might never have. He is a joy to be around, loves hockey and football (especially the Utes) and always has a smile on his face.

My Third Blessing

"Ya Ya" is my youngest daughter. She has the same birth mom as Bubba Doo. I was so thrilled to learn that after so many years of wanting another child that I would now have two more children. Ya Ya had a rough start and had to overcome health and developmental delays. She has an incredible internal strength and I have learned the most from her. She has taught me to view life differently and to realize what is really important. She loves Littlest Pet Shops and Justin Bieber. She continues to amaze me with her strength and fortitude.

My Fourth Blessing

"Bugga Boo" is my youngest son and my baby. He was born at 36 weeks and weighed 5 lbs 13 ounces just like his oldest sister. He also shares Bubba Doo's and Ya Ya's birth Mom. I never in a million years anticipated that I would ever get a 4th blessing. Bugga Boo is a very smart boy. He loves Legos, transformers and building things. He can be quick to anger but also has a quick wit. Of all my blessings, he is the funniest and I never know what will come out of his mouth next. He has taught me that there is always room to love one more and I cannot imagine my life without him.